I'm at shcool.. ew
16 May 2024
I just finished some sort of physics test, not sure if it was a quiz or a test, but guess what!! I aced it!!! Scored 31 out of 35!!! YAY!! But now, with more tests coming up I'm stuck in this cycle of procrastination instead of studying. It's so frustrating, oh my God. So there's this setup where my friend and I are in the same class but taking different subjects. She's doing biology as her second option, so we're not studying it together. She mentioned that someone in our group got a 9 out of 15 on the last test, and I instantly knew it was me. Not exactly a.... nice grade. I'm feeling pretty lost right now. Sure, I could retake the test, but biology feels like this whole other beast compared to my other subjects. It's tough to grasp, and even tougher when it comes to tests. I don't know why it's so different. It's literally the "I'm not like other girls." I'm starting to accept that I might not pass my igcses, and that's a heavy realisation, esp since my parents have high expectations. And then there's those finals to stress about. This whole education system feels like it's cramming knowledge into our heads. Sometimes I wish I had gone for the ged instead of igcse, but nope, I went for it to stick with my friends and make my parents proud, but now it feels like I'm just disappointing everyone. Anyhow! I'm currently in arabic class, which is a welcome break. Arabic and math are like my saving graces in this mess. I chose arabic as a forgien language knowing damn well that arabic that I'm a native, because if I chose arabic as a first language, I'm sure I'd stress myself out even more. But honestly, I'm just exhausted from all of this. + I am hungry, when will this class end??